What kind of difficulties are you experiencing? One of the most misunderstood devices are relays. If you do not have the right type of coil or contacts they can seem to be poor performers, but properly applied they are usually reliable.
There is an electronic (solid state) solution, but opto-isolators or solid-state relays as they are sometimes called are not cheap, especially for high current applications.
They are have very fat switch times, are sealed and have no contacts to wear or oxidize. They will not plug into a relay socket, so some wiring and mounting is required in addition to the $. If you wish to detail your needs (current load or wattage and type of load like lighting, motor, stereo) I can recommend some parts and sources.
RDB